Universe: Where Phantoms Sleep (an Harry Potter RPG website dedicated to a universe filled with post Golden Trio characters. Find another character from that website here.)
OC: Ismene Daria Muse Crest Benedict
Note: Taken from 7th year not long after they returned from winter holiday. That would make Ismene roughly 20? 21? I think….
How do you tell a person that you had once loved that you’re sorry?
It was a question that Ismene had written down in her journal many times but had never actually finished answering. Most often, she wasn’t ready to answer that question so she’d just scribbled it out and wrote about something else. Usually the weather, or exams, or what she ate that day. Despite the fact that the latter always brought good remarks from Ismene’s doctor, it soon became apparent that Ismene was intentionally avoiding the elephant in the room.
And in all honesty, how did she tell Sabriel that she was sorry? Actually “sorry” was a poor word for what she truly felt after the whole debacle of last term. Would she ever really get to talk to him about it? Madame Waffle certainly didn’t think now was the time, but she encouraged Ismene to write down ideas or thoughts about the matter as they came to her and they’d discuss them when her meetings came.
She couldn’t start with justifying herself, that would be wrong. However her father and siblings treated her, it gave her no right to always paint people with the same brush. But her development years had been fueled with that kind of life, of wanting to be loved only to be shunned over a choice she had no say in.
“Personally, I can’t say I’m sorry and yes that does sound shallow and clings to those Slytherin tendencies which I’ve tried to purge from my system.” Ismene stared out at her curtains, trying to find away to answer the question aloud hoping it would inspire her.
“But let’s face the facts. You were right and I was wrong. Heaven help us all a Gryffindor was wrong. We can’t get any deeper into it than that at the current moment because everyone’s afraid I’m going to go off the deep end at any moment.” She swung her legs over the side of her bed and began pacing the dormitory.
“But I am sorry for being such a witch to you last term and for not listening to you and for choosing to stay away when I finally learned the truth and for calling you a liar and several other things that I dare not repeat in polite company.”
She took a breath and thought for a moment. That’s a lot of “I’s, Miss Crest. Ismene could almost here Madame Waffle talking to her. Could she really lay blame at his door? Could she? Should she? She took another look around. No one was here. If Sabriel was here, what would she say?
“You never listened,” Ismene said aloud, finding strange comfort that it had actually been spoken. “I tried to come to you with my concerns about you teaching her and it fell on deaf ears. Later, I tried to apologize. I came after you several times, but each time you just turned me away and didn’t bother to listen, let alone see me!” Ismene had begun pacing the floor ranting off half-truths and lies that she knew she’d never say to him, but it felt good to lay the blame at someone else’s door for once.
“And furthermore…!” She whirled around and had her finger pointed as if she was actually addressing someone, and she stopped in her tracks. Shiloh, one of her dormmates, was standing there in the doorway.
“Um…am I interrupting?” The blonde haired girl looked around the room, checking to see if anyone else was in the room.
Ismene blushed scarlet before falling backwards on her bed, sighing in frustration.